It could be that you’re partner hasn’t kissed anyone or spent hours locked in another’s arms yet, but they could still be having an emotional affair.
Cheating hurts anyway you slice it because it involves broken trust. Unlike physical affairs, it can be difficult to recognize when your partner is crossing the line. Still, there are signs that your partner may be guilty of emotional cheating.
1. They’re super protective of their phone.
Whether it’s being sneaky whenever they’re on their phone or refusing to let you anywhere near it unguarded even if it’s to check the time, it’s an indicator that something has changed. They’re trying to avoid you stumbling on intimate messages that they can’t explain away, so they start taking their phone everywhere with them.
2. There’s a sudden and renewed interest in texting.
If your partner wasn’t the type to pay serious attention to social media but now they’re always on some app texting away, then something is up. They might even get unnecessarily defensive when you point it out.
3. They’re pulling away from you.
Emotional infidelity can sometimes lead to your partner being distant. They’re giving so much of themselves to this other person so they have very little to share with you at the end of the day. They save all the stories about their day for this person while you get the generic “It was fine.”
4. They try to turn every little thing into a fight.
Is your partner constantly looking for an argument? Are the things that spark your fights getting more ridiculous by the day? This could be a sign that they have eyes for someone else. They keep comparing you to the other person in their head and they lash out when you come up short.
They’re not as interested in any displays of intimacy with you.
When your partner is emotionally cheating, it might cause them to withdraw from you physically. They no longer initiate sex and are almost never into it when you do. Things like kissing, hugging, cuddling, and holding hands suddenly feel like asking for too much.
You no longer feel like they prioritize you.
It could be less communication, presence, time, attention, affection, or something else that has gone missing from your relationship lately that makes you feel from far from special. There’s a good chance it’s because someone else is taking up their emotional real estate.
5. They keep making excuses to spend time with a specific person.
Whether it’s working late, helping them out with something, or showing up to events the other person is going to be at. It’s even worse when they’re being secretive and private about it.
6. They can’t seem to stop talking about this “friend.”
If the better part of your partner’s conversations with you features some other party whom they obviously adore, that’s a big red flag. They might even go the other way by completely refusing to discuss the person you’re suspicious of.
7. The way they talk about your relationship is no longer reassuring.
If your partner is developing an emotional affair with someone else, it might make them unsure about the relationship they have with you. They become reluctant to talk about the future, and when they do, it’s never enthusiastically.
8. They’re shady when it comes to discussing how they spend their time.
No one wants to feel like they’re being policed, but it’s another thing for your partner to get angry or defensive when you ask about what they’ve been up to.
9. Your partner keeps flaking on plans involving just the both of you.
They hardly ever make plans to hang out anymore and when you do, they always find a reason to back out or cancel. No one constantly blows off their partner when everything is alright in the relationship.
10. They’ve shared too much information about your relationship with the other person.
There are certain aspects of your relationship that you do not discuss with outsiders other than really close friends. So if your partner is over sharing with some other person, that’s a bad sign. The same applies if it’s your partner who knows an unreasonable amount of personal details about someone else.
11. Your gut tells you something isn’t right.
A lot of the time when you can’t shake the feeling that something is out of place, you’re usually close to the truth. So if you deeply suspect that your partner is emotionally cheating on you, there’s a good chance you’re right. Air your feelings, be honest about your concerns. Hopefully, things can still be salvaged.